Commuter Rail Chronicles - First Special Entry

Why hello homeless, college students, young professionals, and lifers! This is my first attempt at sharing my glorious life as a commuter. Much like the original creator of this blog, I have been taking the commuter rail for years but not until recently has it become a daily occurrence in my life. I too find myself snagging a free Metro newspaper from the Mansfield train station on the early weekday mornings instead of sitting for hours in dreadful traffic up 95 and 93 North... at least that was my supposition at the beginning of the year.

This happens to be my last semester of college and I decided to save money and live at home. I have friends who do the same and they all agree that it's pretty manageable. First problem here is, being my last semester of college I'm forced to take an 8:30 am class (earliest class I've ever taken). Second problem, Mother Nature bitch slapped New England this past winter causing excessive delays (or no shows) of the commuter rail. Third problem, the train has issues regardless of weather to begin with.

Needless to say I have had my fair share of problems these past few months but I'm proud to say I am not a regular. I fit in. In what exactly? The disgruntled group of working Americans who bond over a frustration for public transportation. This being said, I have found the purest form of entertainment through my daily rides. I have always been a fan of people watching and awkward situations but life as a commuter has taken it to a whole new level.

For my first Commuter Rail Chronicle entry I'd like to share with you my favorite memory thus far of my adventures. It took place on Valentine's Day (go figure). Valentine's Day this year was on a Monday, being that I have a night class on Mondays (yes, only to take a late train home and get up for a very early 6:38 train the next morning) I was beyond tired and irritated when my 8:15 Providence train was delayed. When it did arrive it was one of the old trains - you know, not a double decker, dirty blue and maroon seats which displays the artistic work of Great Boston. I sat in a two seater - that was my first mistake. The car I was in also would lose light (electrical problems which caused the delay were pretty obvious). All I wanted to do was to take a light nap and wake up in Sharon (to ensure I was up for Mansfield, duh). Well, my slumber was surely disrupted by the Ruggles stop.

"RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRrrrrrUUUuuuuuGgggleesssss!!!"  Gotta love those conductors.

Anyway, for an 8:10 train on a Monday night, the train was pretty packed and a young lady sat next to me. Now her attire can only be described as the Salem Witch Trials Collection but she was a very nice girl. She told me her life story, where she was from, where she went to school, etc. Friendly and all, but regulars know small talk only goes so far on the commuter rail. This is my time to read, text, pretend to read or text, or just rest. So here we are in our flickering light of a car on the dirty old commuter rail, both with backpacks and books on our laps. She was studying for a psychology test (good for her, so studious!) but the fact that she was whispering to herself was, well irritating in itself. Then the phone call.

"Hi pookie, wookie, snookums-lovey-dovey, lover-bear! Are you still sicky-wicky? I can't wait to get home to you and give you all the loveys that you need my special darling! I'll make you soupy-whoopie, and give you cough medicine and snuggle you all night! I wuv youuuuu, I wuvv youuuuu, can't wait to see youuuuu..." I'm sure the conversation went on but I sat there eyes bulging doing all I could not to vomit on myself, slap the phone out of her hand, or just burst out laughing.

We got off at the same station and I wished her luck on her test tomorrow. Then I got in the car and immediately asked, "MOMMY-WOMMY, How come I don't have a lovey-dovey on a cutesy-wutsey day like today. Am I not lovey-dovey enough?" We shared a good laugh at others misfortune... and my own misfortune.

While some single ladies might find Valentine's Day infuriating, I can't help but laugh and thank Buddha that I had the perfect interaction with a love-bird on that fine Monday night.

Long Live Cheeseboy!

Long Time No Talk....and a brawl

OK OK So obviously I have fell off the wagon (literally and figuratively) when it comes to this blogging nonsense. I would credit it mostly to the fact that I quit my job and don't commute much anymore....well that...and I'm lazy.

But this was too good to pass up.

So my dear friend, Alluria* and I boarded the afternoon train for a well deserved girls date night filled with cheesecake factory and stand up comedy. Seems innocent enough right? There we were, all happy that we scored a seat together at the very back of the train.

It was then we noticed there was something a little....different about this ride. There was the usual cast of characters aboard the train, but this one seemed a bit more...diverse.

It was then we realized that there was an Islamic academy in Mansfield that apparently just got out of session. Apparently there were many of these kids that were commuters from Boston. And apparently, they were all quite loud and obnoxious.

So there we were, sitting amidst a group of what appeared to be somalian muslim teenagers in heat, and being someone used to being surrounded by muslim students, I didn't think anything too crazy was going to happen.

Then there was the soda spill of 2011.

The kids were playfully fighting over a soda. A tug of war- soda battle ensued. All of a sudden BLAM the soda bottle exploded all over one poor girls headscarf....and on the Tim's of an innocent passerby.

We shall call him The Angry Man.

So the Angry Man looked like he was on route from Providence to Roxbury, and he looked none too pleased about his position on the train. After the great soda spill of 2011 he vocalized his discontent in so many words......many of them starting with mother and ending in uckers...

The teenagers were scared back to their seats...or so we thought.

One boy, who appeared to be a little jewish boy until we realized they went to an islamic academy (big whoops) started in on the Angry Man. Though the conversation was a bit unclear, i believe they were arguing over the validity of Angry Mans...anger.

It was then that The Angry Man came over and started throwing punches at Confusingly Jewish Boy. Another, equally confusing Jewish-looking boy came over to try and break it up.

Myself, being a former security guard, felt inclined to step in, however, I was too busy trying to wrap my mind around the absurdity.

Token Middle-aged man in the back of the car started yelling "HEY KNOCK IT OFF" (a very middle aged man thing to say) but the conductor was no where in sight, and due to lack of posse support, the fight broke up in a very awkward anti-climatic way.

Until there, everyone was staring at each other, and The Angry Man said "Hey, which one of y'all has my sunglasses"

The conductor later told the teenagers they can no longer sit together.

And another commuter journey is complete.

*Names have been changed

A wretched week, and a lot of angry commuters

Big news, the Providence/Stoughton line is welcoming a new member to their family...

TF green airport!

A new transportation center opened up near TF Green airport in Warwick Rhode Island, and how better to celebrate than add on another stop to the commuter rail and cause massive delays to the rail while commuters  wait in the freezing cold!

Oh Happy Day!

As you have gathered, these delays have done nothing to help the genuine spirit and morale of early morning commuters. Last week, I had to twice wait over an hour in the cold for a train to come. And when they do, it is usually overly crowded because of all the people waiting at the other stops.

Needless to say, this has been great for people watching.

Typically, the scene is set by hundreds of commuters, waiting on a platform shivering, constantly murmuring their immense dissatisfaction with the states public transportation system.....

But the thing is, Commuter rail is like Dunkin Donuts- they could mess up your order every day but you would still wake up and go back for more.

Perhaps it's the holidays....

People have been so nice lately! Not glaring when you take the middle of a 3 seater, saying excuse me when they bump you...


Perhaps people are in the holiday spirit! How nice!

Just another Manic Monday...

The Scene: Mansfield Train Station

Gloomy and Gray Monday, November 22nd 2010. The typical 8:05 crew has lined up near the yellow line (but not over it) to ascend the iron steps to commuter comfort.

Populus is dressed mainly in black felt-peacoats or otherwise- and many patent leather shoes.

CUE: Train Approaching, please stay behind the yellow line. DING DING DING

And then....disaster.

Today was a day like many others. The train approached, people stayed behind the yellow line, and then a wave of anger swept over the professional faces. The train...normally 8 cars long....was 2 short today.

The crowds went wild. People were scrambling to the cars they thought would be the least populated. The anger was escalating. I heard one woman who had jet black, poofy 80s hair and whispy bangs angrily cry out "WHAT IS THIS!?" to which an equally annoyed, average looking gentleman responded "ITS A TRAIN!!"

I walked past that crowd to the opposite end of the train. I boarded, and lo and behold, there was an available seat next to a pleasant man equipped with a bicycle (The kind that fold up....they are allowed on during peak hours). He seemed to also mildly enjoy the surrounding dissapointment of the drones, and I sat there, playing soduku, as each stop brought more and more angry monday commuter maniacs.

An Alternate Universe

For those of you who have just clicked on this blog link, first of all, Thank you. Secondly, you may think this cannot possibly be a subject of any interest to anyone. The commuter rail is just a simple part of people's lives, just a mode of transportation that does not breed any excitement or wonder. What could you possibly have to say about a train?

Well, quite a bit in fact. I have been taking the commuter rail for many years now, and for many different reasons, and each ride brings forth a whole new host of characters, personalities, and downright strange interactions.

Let me backtrack. I am from the suburbs of Boston. In the burbs, life is typically quiet. Bursting at the seams with mediocrity and routines, the suburbs often are woven with the same thread. Usually the landscape is quilted with colonial filled developments, each one containing a vast network of mid-level professional heads-of-households. While the kids go to school and the inevitable extracurricular sport each day, these professionals go to work. Many of them work locally, but many more work in the city. And even though my town is located right off of 95, to beat traffic, the preferred method of transportation is public...the MBTA commuter rail.

Now, one would be right to assume, that a combination of all of these local professionals would result in a dignified and pleasant ride into the city. But oh, how wrong you are.

There is a force that takes over when you step onto the grimy steps of the commuter rail. An alternate universe that seems to engulf the personality of the rider and turn it down at least 10 negativity points. Things that would never bother you seem to get on your last nerve. You develop a distinct hate for your fellow passengers. Judging a book by it's cover has never been so easy before. Heaven help the poor soul to answer his cellphone, or try to sit in the middle of a three-seater during peak hours.

Well, over the years,  I have taken many trains. And on these trains I have seen many things. And from these things I have had many laughs....and I would like to share some of them with you!